When Harry is gone
by KkatakK
Summary: Ginny goes to Hogwarts. This year, everything is different. No matter what, she won't let the servants of Lord Voldemort to break her. But does new headmaster Severus Snape even want to break Ginny Weasley? For adults only.
1. You must go now

**A/N: I would like to thank to my wonderful beta Easamus. (:**

Ginny knew right then and there that Harry was gone and would be gone for long... until he defeated Lord Voldemort. And that could take years...  
 _'Fuck it'_ she thought.  
Ginny sighed and proceeded to pack the last of her belongings for her trip to Hogwarts. Any other year, she felt excited in the beginning of the school year. It meant seeing Harry, it meant using her wand...  
Right now, there was just a very dull ache in her stomach. She didn't want to go to Hogwarts. Especially with that traitor, Severus Snape, as the headmaster!  
"Ginny! Are you ready? We should leave in a few minutes..." her mum cried after her, her voice carrying through the stairway and into the grim room.  
"Yes, mum!" she responded and sighed again. Her mother was really worried after the fall of the Ministry. Ginny could tell that when she heard her voice quiver and her hands tremble. She surely thought about Ron and Harry a lot. Even if for Ginny, Harry was a love interest, not brother, for her mother, Harry was as her another child.

Ginny went to Kings' Cross only with her mother this time. Her father needed to be at work early in the morning so they had said their good-byes the last evening.  
Her mother helped her with luggage and then hugged and kissed her on the cheek. She worried about her too, Ginny could tell.  
She was grateful that her mother didn't tell her not to disobey at school. Oh, Ginny so longed to disobey.  
"Bye mum," she said sadly because she knew that their communication whole year will be traced. They were traitors after all. And the Ministry kept a close eye on all those that were tagged as traitors.  
She soon found Neville and Luna in one free compartment. Nobody else came to sit with them. They longed to talk but it wasn't safe. They knew that it was better to save the heavier topics for another time and discuss them privately later.  
Luna read her father's paper and Neville explained her something about the plant in Herbology he would study this year when suddenly the train stopped.  
"What is it?" Ginny asked, taking out her wand.  
Luna and Neville also prepared their wands.  
Ginny poked out from their compartment. And then, she saw him there. The traitor. Oh, how she hated him! The killer of Albus Dumbledore. He was with four other men all dressed in black cloaks which billowed out behind them in dark shadows.  
"Miss Weasley, may I ask you to go back to your compartement?" he told her sharply and even though he used word "ask" it was clear to Ginny he meant it as a command. She stood there adamantly, her defiance clear.  
She looked at him, right into his black eyes, sending all the hatered that she felt. After a moment she nodded at him and returned to Luna and Neville.  
They heard somebody scream in tiny voice, a high pitched one. It must have been a girl. Probably a muggle girl?

They moved on after the men checked the whole train and took small and very foolish groups of muggleborns. They checked the compartment in which travelled Ginny Weasley very thoroughly as if they were hoping to find Harry Potter there.  
"Why did they come to Hogwarts?" Ginny asked after they had moved again, almost crying. But she didn't cry, she was strong enough. They would not defeat her, especially not headmaster Severus Snape. She promised herself.

It wasn't shocking for Ginny, she knew that her sixth year at Hogwarts would be hell. But, it still bothered her. And it made her hate headmaster Severus Snape even more.  
The Carrows were even worse than the headmaster, mainly because she saw them more often. Severus Snape no longer taught anything. He just wrote new regulations, starting already on the first day of them at Hogwarts when he announced some changes after the sorting of new students.

It was after first week of school when she discretely whispered in an empty hall into the ear of Neville Longbotom: "We must meet."  
He nodded. "I will take care of it."  
Surprisingly to Ginny, many kids turned up at the first meeting of DA. Almost everybody from the last year's group, except the muggle-borns of course, came and she even saw a few new faces.

It was a bit uncomfortable for her that Michael Corner was there too. They had managed to talk after he dumped her, especially after he found a new girlfriend- Cho (Ginny hated this girl!) but she still had feeling that Michael wasn´t over her.  
Many people from new DA asked her about Harry. She always refused to talk with them about him. She just said: "We are no longer together and I don´t know where he is. But I hope he is alright, doing everything that he can to defeat You-Know-Who."  
The only people she talked with more openly about Harry were Luna and Neville. The three of them were unofficially the leaders of DA with Harry, Ron and Hermione gone. She stayed with them another half hour in the Room of requirements after they dismissed the first meeting.  
"Do you have any news from home?" Neville asked her once they were alone.  
She looked at him rolling her eyes. "Of course not, Neville! They can´t write anything to me. Anything of importance at least. Mother just always writes me that Ron is still seriously ill but the rest of the family is alright."  
"Right." Neville nodded. "And what about your brothers Fred and George?"  
"They had to make some changes in their shop during summer. It´s still open though. Surprisingly. In the end of summer they were talking about some radio station they want to start. Where we would hear real news not what Ministry or Snape and Carrows tell us. I don´t know how to contact them without being monitored and I don´t know if they succeeded."  
"I have a radio," Luna told them dreamily. "I can try to catch their news. What was the name of their station?!  
"I think Potter´s watch... or something like that," Ginny felt her cheeks getting pink. She didn´t know why. It wasn´t her idea at all.  
"That will be nice from you, Luna," Neville smirked and then winked at Luna, who had shifted her gaze to him. Ginny noticed that things between Luna and Neville were different.  
 _´Maybe, if there was no Voldemort, no Snape and Carrows, they would be together,´_ she thought to herself and instantly felt sorry. There was no time for love. They had to fight, right? Or was there?  
Neville touched Luna´s arm. "Be carefull, please."  
"Don´t worry you puny brain, I can handle myself," she smiled, "I will use _muffliato."_  
 _They_ left the Chamber of secrets, let Luna go first so as to not make it look suspicious. After three minutes Ginny left with Neville. They headed towards the Gryffindor tower. Suddenly, Ginny saw the form of headmaster Snape looming them. Ginny's heartbeat got faster.  
"Weasley, Longbottom! What are you doing here this late?" Snape snapped looking straight in the Ginny´s eyes. She felt as if... as if he was reading her mind. And it was possible, she knew about Snape teaching Harry occlumency.  
Surprisingly it wasn´t Ginny but Neville who retorted to Snape: "Sir, we are heading to our dormitory already and have just enough time to get there before curfew."  
"Indeed," Snape said sharply. Ginny was surprised as it seemed that he would leave them... of course it was not all what headmaster Snape wanted to tell them.  
"Both of you! Tomorrow evening at my office. Be there precisely at 6 p.m. as, opposed to you, I don't have much time just to walk around the castle."  
"What?! Why?" Ginny asked angrily.  
"I am your headmaster, Miss Weasley and you will talk with respect when talking me. To be clear, I don´t need to tell you why I do something as it is obvious that you are at my mercy. I think that Dark Lord wouldn´t mind if I slipped a little bit and something happened to you or your friend... And as a matter of fact I have reason for your detention. It´s clear that you weren´t up to any good. My office, 6 p.m. ... Is that clear?" he talked in a low voice which for more forceful with each syllable and slowly getting a little bit closer to her.  
She snorted. "Yes."  
Ginny was red from anger. Almost as red as her hair.  
"Yes what?"  
"Yes, sir."  
"Very well then. Ten points from Gryffindor... for each. Now, you go," Snape dismissed them and stormed out of the hall rapidly.

"I hate him," she spat when they were back at Gryffindor tower.  
"Me too, Ginny."  
"We should already do something, why does DA exist?" she looked expectantly at Neville.  
He put his finger to mouth showing her to be _quiet._  
 _"Muffliato,"_ she said, pointing her wand toward the dormitories.  
"Ok, and what do you want to do, Ginny?" he asked her, raising an eye bow.  
"I don´t know... at least write something on the walls. Bunk a few classes. Release a few creatures in his room. Just show him that it´s not alright!" she hissed.  
"Sleep on it. If you feel like that tomorrow, I shall help you," Neville told her.  
She looked at him. "You changed a lot."  
"How do you mean it?" Neville asked her.  
"I mean, in a good way. You are leader of DA, not me or Luna, you and-"  
"You and Luna help me," he pointed out.  
"Yes, that´s true. Tomorrow then?" He smiled a little bit.  
"Good night, Ginny," he said and kissed her cheek. She didn´t think about that kiss a lot. She was afraid. Too many boys fancied her. Oh, and she could only thing about one... that being Harry Potter.  
 _´Ah Harry, why are you gone?´_ she thought to herself.

Her two roommates were already asleep when she entered their room. Ginny was restless that night and couldn't walk into the dream land, she was full of emotions: anger, hatred but also passion...  
She was a teenage girl full of hormones after all and had her urges. And now, they were acting up. She thought about last year's precious moments with Harry, how he kissed her and held her hand, how he had massaged her breasts... the urge to do something with her arousal was growing stronger each second (as well as her arousal).  
She didn´t like masturbation much but she capitulated in the end, pushing down her panties and touching herself down there... thinking about Harry.  
Few more touches and she was there... moaning lightly. Climaxing alone was relaxing but a whole level less powerful than reaching an orgasm with a lover.  
After that she finally found her rest and fell asleep quickly.  
"Good night, Harry" she whispered, just when she was on the verge of fading to sleep, irrationally hoping he was thinking about her too.  
Women are sometimes just not logical.


	2. Right there, up to us to claim

Neville couldn't come to their detention with Snape.

That she should be alone with Snape didn't worry Ginny as much as the fact why Neville couldn't come. Neville was at Hospital wing because professor Carrow used _Cruciatus_ spell on him during the lesson of the Defence against the dark arts.

She still worried about her friend when she stopped in front of the Headmaster's office. Not only was the fact that one of their professor used the Unforgivable spell, Ginny was almost sure it was only a beginning.

It was 5:59 p.m. precisely.

There were sounds of Snape's fast steps and she saw his dark gaze on her when he let her in.

Neither of them pretended to be polite and didn't loose time to greet each other.

"Sit down, Miss Weasley," he told her coldly pointing at the black sofa facing his desk.

The Headmaster's office didn't change that much since she was there last time, it was just a little bit darker.

She obeyed and waited for him to speak.

She glanced to the portrait where Albus Dumbledore was supposed to be but the painting was empty. Ginny wondered whether Snape used some spell just to get rid of the portrait of the man he killed?

"Now, tell me Miss, where is your friend Mr Longbottom?" Snape asked her after he sat down as well.

"He is at the Hospital wing, not feeling very well after today's lesson of the Defence against the dark arts," she answers his question with catlike expression on her face and narrowed eyes.

"How did he get there?" Snape asked her, his tone no longer being cold or unfriendly... She sensed something resembling to concern in his voice. Ginny only imagined that for sure.

"Professor Carrow," she said angrily.

"Elaborate," he told her.

"He used _Cruciatus_ curse on Neville," she explained wondering from where came the sudden interest.

Something was off, she could tell. Ginny usually saw life as a puzzle, everything coming together and forming an image she sees... With headmaster Severus Snape she was baffled and couldn't explain his actions.

"I will talk with professor Carrow about that, Miss Weasley," he assured her and she didn't know what to think about it. If it were somebody else, Ginny would presume he would be mad at professor Carrow. As it was Snape, she worried that things would get even worse for her friend Neville Longbottom.

'I will warn him,' she made mental note for herself. She planned to visit Neville at Hospital wing if he didn't come back that night.

Snape started to tell her something but she didn't listen to his words... There it was, in the glass case begin Snape's back. The Gryffindor's sword!

Ginny knew Harry needed it. She didn't really know how, she just remembered the trio talking about the sword after the visit of the former Minister of magic to her home. The minister didn't give Harry the sword. Now Ginny, with the aid of reunited DA, could get it to Harry. Somehow.

 _'We must get it,'_ was her first thought.

"Miss Weasley! Are you even listening to me?" enraged Snape asked.

She looked down as she didn't want him to state in her eyes. He mustn't know about her plan which just started to form in her head!

"I am sorry, sir" she murmured.

Snape gave her some paperwork to do. She just rewrote very boring but apparently necessary documents of Hogwarts.

It was only fifteen minutes before curefew when Snape let Ginny to leave.

"Try not cause problem with your friends... It would be unfortunate for me if I had to punish you more than this time," he warned her.

"Good bye, headmaster," she said, lips then forming thight line.  
"Good bye, Miss Weasley," she heard him to say when she was at the door of Headmaster's office alredy.

* * *

Neville came back from Hospital wing already that night. He looked fine. So fine, that Ginny had suspicion Madam Pomfrey knew about the detention with Snape he should have had and tried to withdrew Neville from it.

"How was the detention?"he asked her after she entered their Common room.

She smiled at Neville and joined him at sitting near the fireplace.

"Slightly bearable as we didn't talk and I only rewrote some boring documents," she answered Neville's question.

"Are you allright?" she asked him, touching his arm with concern.

"Yes. Don't worry, Ginny, I can take more..." he answered not looking at her but in the fireplace.

Ginny wanted to tell him about her idea with the sword but was afraid that somebody would hear them.

 _'It can wait for tomorrow. Anyway, we have DA meeting.'_

They talked and it was pleasent. Ginny was somehow popular, at least among boys but she never managed to have 'best friends' as for exemple her brother Ron had Harry and Hermione. She mostly spent her time at Hogwarts with her brothers Fred and George and when they left school she started dating various boys which preoccupied her time.

'Maybe now, she has Neville and Luna. They are new trio.'

She yawned and took it as a signal to go to bed.

"I am sleepy. Good night, Neville. See you tomorrow," she told him after a while of them chatting.

"Good night. I will also go to bed soon. Just need to finish the homework for Herbology," Neville pointed to some books in front of him.

"Right," Ginny smiled.

The sleep came soon as she was tired but was restless, full of nightmares and dark looks of Hogwart's headmaster Severus Snape.


	3. Of hatered, grudge and kisses

_**A/N: Thank you Easamus.**_

Neville didn't received Ginny's idea about stealing the Gryffindor's sword as she hoped. Still he promised her he would help.  
She, Luna and Neville worked on the plan, other members of DA helped too.  
The day came when they would do the deed. It was after few weeks of school, some hours of detention, Cruciatus usage of a Slytherin boy on a Gryffindor first year without punishment and many decrees forbidding most movements, all signed by Headmaster Snape.

"He spends most of his time in his office," Ginny told everybody while they had been planning the whole thing, "that´s why you must be distraction. We need him to be out of his office so we can take the thing Harry needs from behind his back."

No, they didn't make it. They made it to his office but Snape was too fast for them. He came back and they were still trying to break the spells on the sword so that they can take it.

"Weasley, Lovegood, Longbottom! What are you doing?" he cried angrily at them taking Ginny who was nearest by her hand and squeezing it tightly. It hurt. Ginny was scared and so was Luna and Neville.

An unexpected indeed happened. "Severus, please," they heard a familiar voice from the portrait on the wall. It was Dumbledore's voice, Ginny realized.  
"They are your students, remember?" Dumbledore told Snape with strange look.

"Don't take their side," he barked at Dumbledore. Even though, after Dumbledore's words, he seemed to switch the mood.

"Fifty points down from each, two, no three weeks of detention starting tomorrow. I shall notify Rubeus Hagrid about it. Go straight to his cottage. No need for me to see your damn faces again in long time, right?" he asked menacingly.

They just nodded. Not understanding what is going on. No Carrows? Was that even a real punishment? They didn't care about points anymore, it didn't matter at all. And Hagrid was their friend... Snape knew it.

 _'Why?'_ Ginny wondered _. 'Why is he sparing us the worst?'_

"Nobody shall know what happened here. Do you understand? If you will be so foolish to tell anybody, I am sure Carrows will be so kind to take care of you. Now leave!" he dismissed them angrily. He turned his back to them and faced the portrait.

They rushed to the door eagerly when Snape added: "Not you, Weasley. You stay for a moment. I want to talk with you alone."  
Luna's and Neville's expressions of relief was replaced by one of concern. But she bravely nodded at them to go. She could easily deal with Snape. He hadn't hurt her until now, he hoped he would not either in the near future.

The door of the office clasped shut with a maleficent bang after Neville disappeared from their line of sight.

Snape took out his wand and Ginny's heart started to beat faster, scared. There was no reason though. He just made sure not to be heard by anyone while casting spells towards the door and at the paintings of previous headmasters. Deed done, he put back his wand and sat at his desk, pointing at the seat in front of him for her to sit down.

She obeyed, her heart still beating fast. She could see it on her chest and so could he.

He sneered. "Don´t worry Miss Weasley, I shall not harm you. Not today at least," he told her mockingly staring at her eyes.

"I must say that your boyfriend wasn't one of the clever ones so it shouldn't surprise me that neither are you... Still it did surprise me a little bit."  
She just looked at him. Straight face, no emotion showing. Right into his dark eyes.

He looked back at her, not letting her win even this small meaningless war.

"Where is he?" he asked her suddenly.

"Who?" Ginny tried to play dumb.

"Your boyfriend!"

"I don't have a boyfriend," she replied sternly, folding her arms in front of her.

"Ok, so your ex-boyfriend," he said, annoyance brimming in his voice, which dripped with sarcasm.

"Which one, sir? I had at least five boyfriends in past two years," she replied, playing innocent.

"Mr Potter. Don't play stupid little girl, you are not."

She raised her eye-bow. "I thought that just minute ago you told me otherwise."

Snape ignored her comment and just looked in her eyes. His eyes were big and dark and suddenly Ginny realized that they are too big, too sharp. Looking right into her, he read her mind and had seen that she really didn't know where Harry was. But he saw also other things he shouldn´t. About Ron. About DA.

He left her mind but it was late.

"NO!" Ginny cried in horror.

She was shaking, terrified to death. She might die soon. Would they kill her family and everyone dear to her? And what about Neville and Luna? Her mind raced with a thousand misfortunes that could befall upon them.

"I am sorry," his voice was worried.

 _What is happening? Was this some sort of game of his?_ Ginny didn't understand.

Something touched lightly her arm. She stared at Snape who, she didn´t know when, came right next to her chair. It was him.

"Ginny, don´t worry. Everything will be fine. Your family is safe. You are safe."

"What?" she asked. Yes, it was dumb. She was in shock, so what? It was ok to be in shock when Snape transformed within seconds from Dumbledore-killing and Harry-hating Death Eater to this strange man trying to console her. The transformation was too unreal. Too unreasonable. Too impossible. Too fast.

"What is happening?" she asked him.

"I can't tell you. Only that you don't have to worry about your family."

"You killed Dumbledore, you are a damn death eater, of course I would worry!" she cried out.  
 _Oh! Stupid girl, shut up!_

"You really are dumb after all," Snape remarked and left hold of her hand. "You are also lucky. If I had been real death eater, you would be damned."

Her mouth dropped. Did he just confessed to her that his real alliance did not lie with Voldemort?

"As you are dumb, it would be really inconvenient for me if you had all this knowledge. Please, don't make me force you to forget and just drink it like last time," as he was saying it he poured a liquid in a small black mug in front of her.

She didn't move. She remembered. The kiss!

He saw that she remembers.

" _Obliviate_."

The world around Ginny lost all its colours and resolved to black...


	4. Prelude: The sword is not gone

She was naked in the arms of man she loved. Half asleep, half awake, listening to their breathing, feeling the flesh of the man behind her.

He put his left hand on her left hip. She shivered from the coldness of his skin touching her skin.

 _´Why is Harry suddenly so cold?_ ´Ginny wondered. ´ _Is he dead?´_

She turned to face her beloved man. Shock overwhelmed her. It wasn´t Harry at all! Dark hair, sickly pale skin... It was Severus Snape!

She almost cried loudly out of shock but he stopped her, covering her mouth with his long cold fingers and pinning her to his bed with his own naked body.

"Hush, stupid girl," he hissed.

 _´He raped her, he used some spell on her...´_

Was it a dream or a memory? Ginny couldn´t say... as well as she couldn´t say what happened after Luna and Neville left her at Headmaster´s office.

"You weren´t there for too long, less than fifteen minutes for sure," Luna told her.

"What did he do to me, Luna? Why don´t I remember anything?" Ginny almost cried that evening. She was talking with Luna in probably the last at least a little bit safe place in the castle- the Chamber of Requirements which was currently transformed into a small room with sofa, cushions and comfortable decorated with flowers.

Ginny felt worried, even desperate. She needed to know what he did to her.

Did he raped her? That didn´t make sense. Of all people, he didn´t seem to like her or any other girl in school. Snape despised his students and Ginny would go so far to say that he despised all men and women.

He seemed to hold no grudge towards one man, being it Dumbledore, and the girl knew very well how Dumbledore´s life ended. Her Harry was there, he told her about it.

Luna embraced Ginny sitting on the green sofa.

"I don´t know, Ginny. He must have used some spell, we couldn´t hear anything from outside," she told her with shame in her voice. They should have not left Ginny there alone. Luna could see that now. "I am so sorry, Ginny!"

Ginny shook her hand. "No, don´t be Luna, it´s not your fault. At least he didn´t do anything bad to you two. And whatever he did to me, it couldn´t be that bad when I am sitting here right now, could it?" she reassured Luna. Or rather herself.

She still couldn´t get rid of the dream/memory of Snape sleeping in the same bed as she was. ´ _What is happening?´_


End file.
